Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Coffee, a monkey and glue

Coffee, a monkey and glue. Those were my problems of the morning. Seemed everything was going wrong. It's not Monday, but it sure felt like one since the girls had off of school yesterday. I was dragging it pretty bad this morning and after shipping them off on the school bus, coffee sounded AMAZING. I popped a k-cup in the keurig and sniffed the air as the scent filled the kitchen. MMMMM. I mixed in some sugar and poured half and half in the cup, stirred, and that's when the problems started. What was that little white blob floating in my coffee? Another one. Another one. Those are friggin curdles. The date on the half and half is nearly 3 weeks away. :( Major sad face!!!! So I dumped the coffee and started my projects for the day. Project 1: diaper cake. I have never made a diaper cake. I don't even think I had one made for me when I had a baby shower years ago. Come to think of it, I don't even know if I've ever seen one in person and I am positive I never cared enough to look closely. But a dear friend of mine and I were chatting about her up coming baby shower and she mentioned that her loser friend who offered to make her one flaked out on her and probably wasn't even coming to the shower because it was her "Birthday weekend." She is about to have her third child and has never had a big all-out baby shower before. I'm not about to let her be disappointed. She touched on finding someone to make her one and paying for it herself. UM. NO. Since finances were kind of limited after back to school, 2 car registrations/inspections/repairs, and 2 baby showers this week, I had to do this on a budget so there was no ordering a ridiculously outrageously priced diaper cake option. So I Googled it. Easy enough. I had already bought her a pack of diapers so I opened them up and started rolling! I managed to make it almost look like an actual diaper cake. Woohoo. I set my goal low Somewhere between doesn't suck and at least it's not falling apart. Mission accomplished. Then my crafty brain took over and I busted out the craft box. After borrowing my hot glue gun back from the neighbors who borrowed it months and months ago (because I craft so often nowadays) I got to work glueing ribbon and bows and making it kind of pretty. Then came the monkey. Have you ever tried getting a monkey to stay in one place? Not easy right? Not even if he's stuffed. This stuffed monkey looked super cute at the top of that cake. But he kept falling over backwards. So I tied his legs to the cake with thread. That worked for all of 5 minutes. Then he started falling forward. So I tied some thread around his neck. I couldn't get it to tie properly around the ribbon or diapers without making him look like a crooked neck "walker" on the Walking Dead so I decided to glue the thread to the ribbon. Instead, however, I glued my finger to the ribbon. I'm pretty sure I screamed every curse word I could think of in that five seconds that my finger screamed with burning, searing pain. I pulled and I shook and I couldn't get the damn thing off my finger. I jumped up and ran, because apparently the glue was chasing me, and the entire diaper cake fell apart except for the ribbon that was still attached to my finger. Yep. I checked. No fingerprints left!!! Good news, the monkey was still attached to the top of the cake. I think I need a coffee :/